Yesterday I was so excited to have the opportunity to experience a little bit of Zac's photography world. We dropped the Men off with my sister and headed to a friends house to photograph her almost 1 month old twins. It was the most fun I have had in a long time. I honestly don't even remember the last time Zac and I went somewhere together (with out the men). The shoot itself was a learning experience for us all and was fun and challenging at the same time. I got to help a lot and spent most of the time holding one or the other of the twins TRYING to get them to go to sleep and stay asleep for their photo session :)
I must admit that while holding them a itty bitty part of me longed for those days when my Men were little (well never quite as little as these two were) But this morning as I attempted to wake Gryphyn and Vahn up, I was overwhelmed with my love for them and the memories of their whole little lives. It has only been 5 years since I became a mommy. But SO much has happened, there are so many stories and moments and stories of how I have had a part in shaping who they are. I am amazed that God saw it fit to give me my two wonderful Men. Over the years, some things have changed drastically while other things haven't changed at all.
First to wake up is Gryphyn. He is NOT a morning person - never has been. So the process is a bit involved to get him to wake up in the mornings for school. As usual, he had migrated to our bed sometime during the night. Despite our efforts to get him to stay in his bed, he has always slept better snuggled up with Mom and Dad. As an infant, I would rock him to sleep then try and lay him in his crib without waking him up - usually unsuccessfully - so a lot of nights were spent cradled in mommies arms to sleep. He also, doesn't like clothes so he usually strips down to little pj shorts during the night which usually causes him to wake up cold during the night. Which conveniently provides him the perfect excuse to climb into Mom and Dads warm bed. Gryphyn has ALWAYS loved to be naked. However despite his efforts as an infant, he wasn't able to communicate this "need" to be naked to us. Looking back though I can see it. When I would wrap him up like "burrito" baby he would fuss and wiggle and squirm until he had his arms free then he would calm down and eventually fall asleep. He LOVED being naked and free - Bath times were always a great source of joy for him.
This morning as I sat on the edge of my bed holding him, rubbing his bare tummy and telling him it was time to wake up, he scrunched up his face and stretched his arms over his head softly moaning in protest. So much like when he was a baby - only now he doesn't fit in my lap anymore. As he finally opened his eyes, the first word were "I'm hungry" ~ Still the only reason in his mind to wake up.
After I made Gryphyn breakfast, I went to Vahn's room to wake him up. He is my morning person and usually wakes up fairly happily and in a good mood. This morning, I sat on the floor next to his bed and pulled him in my lap. As I held him in my lap rocking and kissing him, I was overwhelmed by how innocent he looked. His soft long eyelashes and little perfect nose filled my heart with amazing motherly love and brought tears to my eyes. My little Man is growing up so fast. He is getting so big that I am starting to confuse him with Gryphyn from behind. He is so NOT a baby anymore. He has a huge vocabulary, and incredible yearning to learn about everything. He has a huge quest for knowledge and copies everything that he hears. I am amazed to hear the grown up things that he says. For a 3 year old the depth of his conversations blow me away. For example, instead of saying a simple NO, he will say something like "Actually I don't want to do that".
I'm pretty sure he can use the computer and Daddies iPad better than I can. He is such a happy little boy. He has always been the "easy" one. Although now, he is becoming quite stubborn and tests the limits on everything. He keeps me on my toes. He misses Gryphyn so much while he is at school and can't wait until he is old enough to go to school also. Till then we read and play a lot - he soaks up every moment of it. As do I.
Although, sometimes it seems like an eternity, I am reminded that my time with my Men is short.
Today, I am so thankful for my Men. Thankful that I have been given the honor of molding these two precious little lives. I have no idea what I am doing most of the time - everyday has new challenges - its a learning process for both them and I. But each day my love for them grows and I pray that I will be a good mommy and make the right choices that will mold them into great Men one day.
Gryphyn and Vahn, I love you beyond words. I am so blessed to have you!
Mommy
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